A friend_who_doesn't_want_to_be_identified_here gave me a great feedback regarding PSD Convocation on Career Guidance. This is perfect and unique, because she is a mother of two bright students.

Here's what she wrote to me:

When Kyomii was about to graduate high school, I often told her to chase her dreams, to pursue her PASSION even if it meant leaving her family, friends, and relatives. Her strong subjects were mathematics and science, in fact, she got a perfect score in SAT in these categories. Much I wanted her (if possible) to pursue a career in biomedical engineering because she excelled in both math and science, yet, she alone had the final say on the choice of her career and all we could do is support and guide her. In other words, we let her pursue a career that she has PASSION or LOVE for and let her imagination soar.

She loves singing. When she was a freshman in high school, she auditioned for the modern choir (elite choir). She failed! She was devastated! It was her first taste of major disppointment in life. It was hard for me to see her hurt. I said, "don't worry, you can try again next year." She practiced and practiced. Everyday. Every night. Every week. Every month. I could see the strong determination in her. When the next audition finally came, she tried out again and this time, she made it. She was ecstatic! She came home with a huge smile and announced in excitement, "mom, dad, I got on the modern choir." We were happy for her.

She manifested a very interesting point here. She didn't let FAILURE discourage her. Instead, she learned from it, worked on her weaknesses and polished it until she got better. I amazed at how well she has become in singing now. She is obviously pursuing her PASSION, that is, singing and writing songs.. Although I remind her repeatedly that academics come first so just in case the writing and singing fail, she has something to fall back on. But, from my observation, I think she is pursing both the singing and the academics. She is obviously in charge of her future and all we can do as parents is to try as much as we can to support her. During her recent concert in our town, people said, "I didn't know she is this good!" or "what is she doing in Stanford, why not become a songwriter?"

Of course, FAMILY is important. I alway tell my kids to love their family. They will not be able to reach their goal unless they acknowledge the people who shaped their life, who supported them through thick and thin, who put up with their mood swings, and who love them unconditionally even at their worst.

Nowadays, it is extremely hard to go to college considering the cost of college education. The students will have to make some SACRIFICES to finish their degree. They can not just rely on their parents alone. They need to help earn as much as they can to make up for their parents' shortcoming. My daughter is holding two jobs at Stanford. I don't send her monthly allowances. She earns it herself by tutoring bunch of fifth graders in math and also working as a production manager in the Stanford Concert Network. She takes care of the sounds and lighting and she gets paid for it. When she came home last Christmas, she had about 5 pay stubs that hadn't been cashed because she didn't have time to go to the bank. My husband cashed the checks for her.

Repeatedly, I remind my children to practice HONESTY. Intelligence alone will not take you up there. Combination of both will. When we recently went to Washington to attend a family reunion, we learned that Jay (my husband's cousin), despite of his lack of formal education, was promoted to a higher level. In fact, one PHD holder is working for him. Amazingly, he surpassed others who have higher education. Why? Simply, he has the attributes, qualities, skills, and intelligence for the job. I reiterated his achievements to my children and I hope that they will get the essence that intelligence or higher education alone is not enough to guarantee you the top spot.

I know I talked more about my eldest daughter. My youngest daughter is doing just as well. I never stop in teaching them for independence. Lele got a huge scholarship from Northern Ariz University without even asking for it. It was a surprise gift for us. God is Good!